It's common knowledge.

And, it seems, it's also a common practice, even if not in all quarters.

Old rules of social etiquette encourage us to avoid talking about politics at the dinner table, for example. So, it’s not surprising that many consider it bad manners in good company, like speaking with your mouth full or using your sleeve as a napkin, only much more disruptive.

No less an authority on the subject than Miss Manners once told us that "religion, politics, and sex are generally taboo at the dinner table. Unwelcome attempts to introduce these topics should be met with silence, so the matter drops."

Emily Post was saying much the same thing almost a century ago.

But, even if we think it’s a good idea to try to avoid conflict at family dinners, extended family gatherings and a range of other social events, by avoiding political discussion and debate, just what is it that we are trying avoid talking about…or arguing about?

Merriam-Webster’s dictionary defines "politics" broadly, to include:

• The art or science of government
• The art or science concerned with guiding or influencing governmental policy
• The art or science concerned with winning and holding control over a government

I could be wrong, but it’s my impression that when people talk about not talking about politics, much of the time they’re referring to the last item on that list — the realm of campaigns and elections; of partisanship and political power.

Nowadays, it’s easy to appreciate that a lot of discussions and "friendly" debates about that aspect of politics become as uncivil and unpleasant as so much — too much — of the electoral and power politics we read in the news, see on television, hear on the radio, and experience on social media is rife with rancor, even hatefulness. And so it is also easy to appreciate why many people want to avoid it, especially among family and friends.

But…

Perhaps it is time to rewrite some of the rules about polite conversation. Or, at least, reconsider what you are including when you avoid talking about "politics."

Go ahead. At least, for now, if it works best for you, stick to staying away from arguing about campaigns and candidates and partisan politics and elections…and so on.

Instead of including almost everything related to government on your list of banned subjects, however, consider making an effort to talk about specific problems and challenges we face. In other words, focus on real issues that affect our country.

And if even that seems too risky, how about focusing on the issues that affect your local community?

The distinction is an important one. I worry that when people try to avoid discussing…or arguing about…politics, in general, they end up avoiding conversations about, and engagement in, the important issues we face closer to home. Perhaps not talking about politics is connected to not participating in the civic life of your town, or your county, because it’s easy just lump it all together as, well, politics, and stay away from all of it.

But most local issues that matter to us, to our families, to our communities, to our quality of life, are not inherently partisan or political issues.

Local government is quite literally the government that is closest to home. In city halls and the county seat, neighbors that we elect, in a very public and accessible process, make decisions about local issues that shape our communities and affect our lives.

None of that public process and none of those decisions are likely to generate better results, for you or for us, when so many, or most people aren’t paying attention and don’t get involved.

In one column, Miss Manners actually provided her "gentle readers" a selection of sample remarks meant to draw someone's attention away from politics. Her suggestions included:

"Are you finding the pothole situation any better?"

"Traffic is getting just like New York around here."

Without intending to, perhaps, Miss Manners was pointing out a couple examples of local issues.

It may be that some of our neighbors just don't care about many local issues. But I don’t think that’s true of most of us. If people didn't care about traffic and crowded schools and a long list of other local matters, they wouldn't complain about them.

There is no doubt we aren’t all going to agree with each other about some things. I assume most of us don’t agree about everything with our spouse, or our family, or our friends. But we are a community, and we are in this together. We might consider exchanging views on these subjects to be a worthwhile way to spend an conversation or two, or more.

And that starts with paying enough attention, so that we’re able to talk with each other more than just complaining about something that isn’t working or that we don’t like.

As a member of the Frederick County Council, I’ll be writing a column here each month, most of the time focusing on one or more of the important local issues we are working to address.

I encourage you to pay attention to these issues, and to talk about them with each other, and to get more involved in the decision-making process. Don’t leave all the paying attention and talking and influence to others.

That would make a fine New Year’s resolution!

Either way, though, best wishes to all of you for a wonderful new year!