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2004 Darwin Awards
- According to police in Windsor,
Ontario, Daniel Kolta, 27, and Randy Taylor, 33, died in a
head-on collision, thus earning a tie in the game of chicken
they were playing with their Snowmobiles.
- A 49-year-old San Francisco
stockbroker, who "totally zoned when he ran," accidentally
jogged off a 100-foot-high cliff on his daily run.
- Buxton, NC: A man died on a beach when
an 8-foot-deep hole he had dug into the sand caved in as he sat
inside it. Beach-goers said Daniel Jones, 21, dug the hole for
fun, or protection from the wind, and had been sitting in a
beach chair at the bottom Thursday afternoon when it collapsed,
burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach, on the
outer banks, used their hands and shovels, trying to claw their
way to Jones, a resident of Woodbridge, VA, but could not reach
him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour
to free him while about 200 people looked on. Jones was
pronounced dead at a hospital
- According to police in Dahlonega, GA,
fellow cadet Jeffrey Hoffman stabbed ROTC cadet Nick Berrena,
20, to death in January 23, who was trying to prove that a knife
could not penetrate the flak vest Berrena was wearing.
- Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed
in Selbyville, Del, as he won a bet with friends who said he
would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth
and pull the trigger.
Honorable Mention:
- In Guthrie, Okla, in October, Jason
Heck tried to kill a millipede with a shot from his 22-caliber
rifle, but the bullet ricocheted off a rock near the hole and
hit pal Antonio Martinez in the head, fracturing his skull.
- In Elyria, Ohio, in October, Martyn
Eskins, attempting to clean out cobwebs in his basement,
declined to use a broom in favor of a propane torch and caused a
fire that burned the first and second floors of his house.
- Paul Stiller, 47, was hospitalized in
Andover Township, NJ, and his wife Bonnie was also injured, when
a quarter-stick of dynamite blew up in their car. While driving
around at 2 AM, the bored couple lit the dynamite and tried to
toss it out the window to see what would happen, but apparently
failed to notice the window was closed.
And the Winner:
In Tacoma, Wa., Kerry Bingham had been
drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a
person who had bungee-jumped from the Tacoma Narrows Bridge in the
middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least
10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 am. Upon
arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one
had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking,
volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay
nearby One end of the cable was secured around Bingham's leg and
the other end was tied to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet
before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He
miraculously survived his fall into the icy river water and was
rescued by two nearby fishermen. "All I can say "said Bingham, "is
that God was watching out for me on that night" "There's just no
other explanation for it." Bingham's foot was never located.
Submitted by Bill, Narberth, PA.
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True Bravery
True bravery is arriving home stinking drunk
after a very late night out with the boys.....
Then....being assaulted by your wife with
a broom, And still having the guts to ask:
"Are you cleaning, or were you flying
somewhere?"
Submitted by Part, Clear Lake, Va.
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I lived on a farm when I was a
child ... ... Times
were hard back then, and the area where I lived was economically
depressed. I knew that the neighbors were having a hard time
making ends meet. One day, I heard a knock at the door, and when I
went to answer, this is the sad sight that I saw that broke my
heart.
Submitted by
Dick, Williamsport, Md
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