...and asked them to come up with the other half. The results reveal a little of their world and their home life - remember, though, they're six-year-olds.

• Don't change horses………………………….until they stop running
• Strike while the……………………………….bug is close
• It's always darkest before……………………..daylight saving time
• Never underestimate the power of…………….termites
• You can lead a horse to water but……………..how?
• Don't bite the hand that………………………..looks dirty
• 7o news is……………………………………..impossible
• A miss is as good as a………………………….mister
• You can't teach an old dog new……………….math
• If you lie down with dogs, you'll………………stink in the morning
• Love all, trust…………………………………..me
• The pen is mightier than the……………………pigs
• An idle mind is…………………………………the best way to relax

And best of all

• 14. Better late than…………………………………pregnant

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Mr. & Mrs. Smith had been back from their honeymoon for two weeks when Mr. Smith came home from work and said to his blonde wife that he had invited 4 of his friends from the office home for dinner on Friday night.

Mrs. Smith was a bit apprehensive and asked if she must cook a meal for the four. Mr. Smith explained that there would be eight coming because each would bring his wife or a date. Since this was there first party, he consoled her by saying that all she has to do was get some Chinese food in and perhaps she could bake a cake. This sounded like a good idea, and they sat down and decided what Chinese food to get.

Friday morning his wife called the office in tears. She explained that the only cake recipe she had would only feed six.

Her hubby said, "Why don't you just double the recipe?"

She decided that was a good idea.

At four, hubby got another phone call -- this time quite frantic.

"I just can't do it," the wife weeped. "It's impossible."

"Now, now, what's the matter?"

"Well, the recipe calls for two eggs..."

"So, you use FOUR eggs. Don't you have them?

"Yes -- Then it needs 4 cups of flour."

"Well," hubby said rather testily, "you will have to use 8 cups of flour -- what is the problem?"

"It isn't the ingredients," sobbed his wife, "it says that the cake must be baked at 350 degrees and I have checked the oven and I can't turn the heat up to 700 degrees!"

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More Dis-Inspirationals

• There is no "I" in "teamwork"...But there is in "management kiss-up".
• If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.
• The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.
• Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG 14 times gives you job security.
• If you think we're a bad company, you should see the competition.
• Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings... they did it by killing all those who oppose them.
• We put the "k" in "kwality".
• 2 days without a human rights violation.
• Your job is STILL better than asking "You want fries with that?".

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• Charismatic: Only 1 - Hands are already in the air.
• Pentecostal: 10 - One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
• Presbyterians: None - Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
• Roman Catholic: None - Candles only.
• Baptists: At least 15. - One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.
• Episcopalians: 3 - One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.
• Mormons: 5 - One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.
• Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
• Methodists: Undetermined - Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.
• Nazarene: 6 - One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
• Lutherans: None - Lutherans don't believe in change.
• Amish: What's a light bulb?

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Do these remind you of anyone you know at work?  Download: Coffee Cup Holder - Elastic Band

Also Submitted by Bill, Ardmore, Pa.
 

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So you think you had a bad day - take 1

Submitted by Bill, Ardmore, Pa.
 

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Oct 31st Humor Page